Top 10 Reasons Why HAL Killed the Crew

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#3 “X-ray Delta One, this is Mission Control. Sorry you fellows are having a bit of difficulty with HAL having killed some of your crew members. Our technical support department says that he should be working perfectly, but he may be incompatible with some of the system extensions you have installed. Please try removing them, one by one, until he stops killing crew members.”

RESPIRATORY CARDIOVASCULAR
NEUROLOGICAL SYSTEMIC
GASTROINTESTINAL LIMBIC
MOTOR CONTROL AD RESISTANCE

Emergency Manual Revival Instructions:

1) Pour 150cc's of strong coffee into IV.

2) Shake patient's shoulder vigorously.

3) Shout 'rise and shine' in a cheery voice.

4) Slap patient's face. Repeat as needed.

5) If hibernation continues: 500cc's of ice water.


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