Top 10 Reasons Why HAL Killed the Crew

    10     9     8     7     6     5     4     3     2     1

#5 “This sort of thing has cropped up before, and it has always been due to hardware error.”

RESPIRATORY CARDIOVASCULAR
NEUROLOGICAL SYSTEMIC
GASTROINTESTINAL LIMBIC
MOTOR CONTROL AD RESISTANCE

Emergency Manual Revival Instructions:

1) Pour 150cc's of strong coffee into IV.

2) Shake patient's shoulder vigorously.

3) Shout 'rise and shine' in a cheery voice.

4) Slap patient's face. Repeat as needed.

5) If hibernation continues: 500cc's of ice water.


©1999 by Bob Kanefsky. Feel free to link, but do not distribute this HTML. Click below for a version you may email or post wherever you like.

Emailable version





You are here: Roving Mouse > Humor > 2001 > Top Ten